WTF Not . . .

I’ve finally figured it out. It’s taken me countless hours of driving Albuquerque’s freeways, but I’ve finally figured it out. What was it Sherlock Holmes used to say? Something like “When you’ve eliminated all suspects, it has to be the obvious one.” (Okay, I paraphrased, get over it.)

It’s something so totally inexplicable, so utterly confounding, that I just couldn’t see the forest for the trees. Every day and every evening, going to work and going home, the traffic on the freeway comes to a dead stop.

Nobody. Phuquing. Moves.

Stopped. Dead.

Inching along at less than a snail’s pace. Stop. Inch a little more. Stop. Ten miles and an hour later, as you head for your exit—on which, by the way, traffic is also inching along—you haven’t seen one bloody thing that might have caused ANYbody to slow down, much less stop.

I exaggerate. On some days, someone might have a flat tire and everybody has to slow down to gawk. Or some poor soul got pulled over (for what is anybody’s guess since nobody’s going over 0.5 miles per hour) and everybody has to stop and make sure it’s not someone they know. But, those occasions are becoming a rarity. Entertainment almost. At least you can growl under your breath about people not minding their own business.

One day I had an epiphany. I figured it out. Each and every utility user of the greater Albuquerque metropolitan area (don’t laugh) receives a post card in the mail from the Traffic Division. It reads, to wit:

“The week of (insert week ending date), you are hereby assigned to stop, slow down, or otherwise disrupt the smooth flow of traffic on either Interstate 25 and / or Interstate 40 at least twice during the week, once in one direction and once in the return direction. It is your duty as a citizen of this great town. Failure to comply with this assignment will result in revocation of your freedom to buy alcoholic beverages for a minimum of 30 days or utility use for 120 days (depending upon the going utility rates).

“You drive and don’t stop, you lose happy hour or your lights.”

This *has* to be what’s happening. Nothing else makes sense.

I can’t wait until I get my card! I think I’ll try driving the speed limit. . . After all, I don’t drink, and the utility company has shut me off once already this year… WTF not.

A New Beginning

Well, it's all over. I have permanent custody of my granddaughter. We can start working on making things real.

Her mother didn't even show. Now, if she reappears and decides she wants her daughter, she'll have to do all the things the court wanted her to do in the first place.

Bre is having a hard time coming to terms with the fact that her mother has disappeared again. Her mother has done this so very many times, only this time has been the longest. She's finally let go of the fact that "Mommy promised she'd buy me some new shoes" and that's not going to happen. Now, she occassionally points to her feet and insists she needs new shoes and we must simply go get them (never mind she's gotten two new pairs from Nana since Mommy's promise, she still needs them). When fall arrives, she'll get another pair or two and perhaps that will satisfy her.

All in all, it happened a lot quicker than I expected, a lot slower than I wanted, but we're done.

Helluva birthday present for me, huh?

Excuse me while I dance in my chair and hum a happy tune.

-*poof*-

Yeah, you read that right: -*poof*-

That's what appears to have happened to Bre's mother. Had some minor issues with visitation; she didn't seem to understand the English the judge spoke quite plainly three times about how she had to be under a doctor's care and taking her meds and have a place to live before she could start unsupervised visits. When my attorney finally got it through to her (after an illegal attempt at a visit), she just -- -*poof*-ed. Vanished. No calls, no visits, not even a stinking flower.

She didn't show up for court-ordered mediation (which I thought was a pretty lousy idea anyway, but the judge doesn't know Bre's mother).

Monday, August 7 is our next hearing. Wonder what will happen when she doesn't show for that.

...Course I know better than to even be thinking along those lines. She manages to surprise us all once in a while. She'll probably show up just for the aggravation factor. 'Course what she doesn't get is that most judges don't like aggravation.

This could get interesting . . .